I love gardening. And this time of the year is full of waiting! Waiting for the seedlings to grow indoors, waiting for the last frost date, waiting for rain… then getting overwhelmed with the rain and waiting for sunshine and blue skies. Waiting is in every step of the gardening process. It’s exciting and full of anticipation at times and then frustrating and infuriating at others, but there it remains… waiting all along.

Why do I do it? Why wait? Why garden at all? Wouldn’t life be much easier (and free of the burden of waiting) if I just didn’t care? Aaaah, there it is. I wait because I care, there is something in the gardening that I find valuable and worth pursuing. There is life in it for me, in cultivating the life of these plants. And not just life in the food produced, but in the entire process of gardening itself.

Ok, I care. And because I care, I pursue something worth while (here, it is gardening). And in that pursuit I must wrestle with the tension between things as they are now and my vision for what they can become. It’s risky to pursue a thing… it may not come to fruition. Of course, it’s risky to not pursue a thing too… then nothing will come to fruition. So I must befriend and learn from that virtue, Hope. The process of waiting is a process of cultivating a relationship with Hope, and learning to rest in and draw from her in times of despair. Because in the wilderness of waiting there are wolves prowling.

Fear will show up, you can count on that! Doubt too, and anxiety. These three cousins prowl about together in the wilderness of waiting, seeking whom they may devour. Anytime you care, anytime you pursue a thing of value and are in the wilderness of waiting for it, these three will show up. And it is in these times of despair that we must learn to rest in and rely on Hope! She is the light of Eärendil, that beloved star.

Perhaps that’s why I love gardening… in the times of waiting it cultivates a relationship with Hope that I desperately need. A relationship that I’ll be able to trust when the dark times in life come. When I’m tempted to abandon all to fear, doubt and anxiety, to give up caring at all. When I’m tempted to befriend more dubious characters just to avoid the loneliness in times of waiting… then I’ll know that I can rest in Hope. And through her, also gain the company of faith and love.   

*Accompanying music for this post is Connie’s Song, by Xavier Rudd. Check it out at the top right side of this post.

Connie’s Song, Xavier Rudd, Food in the Belly